Confused of whether your feelings for me are similar to mine for you- I spend most of my days and nights puzzled and constantly remembering the short time we shared together. It almost feels like if I keep remembering those times, detail for detail I will come to re-live them once again.
Scribbling frantically every second chance I get- I try and turn my thoughts into words, and then turn those words into soulful sentences that could possibly put into meaning the feelings I hold inside this heart of mine. As if putting the words together to form the sentences will somehow verify our reality.
Scared to admit that I may in fact be wrong about this whole thing that we have going on- I like to think this is mutual and that where ever you are, you're thinking about me just as much as I do you. To tell myself I am wrong seems almost as real as telling myself that 'we' doesn't exist. Its just not acceptable.
Eager to see you come back home to me again, I keep telling myself that they days will roll by quickly enough to spare us the pain of delaying what we are about to experience. In the mean time, I need to get my affairs in order and figure out how to deal with whatever situation lies ahead: good or bad.
I write this in one of my lonely moments, just before I say a prayer and go to bed.
"Dear God,
This is my solemn prayer to You: guide me through these emotions, help me sort fear from confidence and let me blossom in Your Light so that I have the courage and strength to love so purely again; a pure, unconditional, innocent and genuine love that I can shower on him for he does not deserve to be punished for the sins committed by the last.
Amen"
Scribbling frantically every second chance I get- I try and turn my thoughts into words, and then turn those words into soulful sentences that could possibly put into meaning the feelings I hold inside this heart of mine. As if putting the words together to form the sentences will somehow verify our reality.
Scared to admit that I may in fact be wrong about this whole thing that we have going on- I like to think this is mutual and that where ever you are, you're thinking about me just as much as I do you. To tell myself I am wrong seems almost as real as telling myself that 'we' doesn't exist. Its just not acceptable.
Eager to see you come back home to me again, I keep telling myself that they days will roll by quickly enough to spare us the pain of delaying what we are about to experience. In the mean time, I need to get my affairs in order and figure out how to deal with whatever situation lies ahead: good or bad.
I write this in one of my lonely moments, just before I say a prayer and go to bed.
"Dear God,
This is my solemn prayer to You: guide me through these emotions, help me sort fear from confidence and let me blossom in Your Light so that I have the courage and strength to love so purely again; a pure, unconditional, innocent and genuine love that I can shower on him for he does not deserve to be punished for the sins committed by the last.
Amen"
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment